


Strength In Love

by ForTheLoveOfVulcan



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Episode Related, Fluff, Jim needs Spock, M/M, My First Fanfic, They are so cute, and Spock meets Surak, really short, the one were Jim meets Lincoln
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 11:07:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11850300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForTheLoveOfVulcan/pseuds/ForTheLoveOfVulcan
Summary: It' the episode with Surak and Lincoln and that giant rock monster. I'm bad at summaries, but Jim has a hard time being Captain and Spock is always there for him, even when he can't touch him.





	Strength In Love

Kirk can't believe the alien in front of him. Made of rock and burning to the touch, if his hand has anything to say about that. They make no sense, wanting good or evil to prevail, no acceptance of peace or refusal. Putting over 400 lives on the line all for nothing but an experiment. Kirk is nearly ready to have a break down.  
His throat feels tight, his head throbs and his hand burns. More death. There is always death. People relying on him to keep them safe, and he can't. He can feel the emotions building to a point where he would like nothing more than to actually burst into tears (something that rarely happens, but on occasion has) or to wake and this become a bad dream. But after all he's seen, sometimes dreams aren't this peaceful.  
He looks over at Spock, and the half Vulcan can see the helplessness and pain in his eyes. He feels remorse, yet with Surak standing so near by, observing him and his captain so, he feels almost wronged. He feels at war with himself, he wants to reach out for his captain, his friend, the one he loves, but with the eyes of Surak so atunely focused on him, he feels that it would be too unVulcan, and that the feeling of Surak's disapproval will hurt him deeply. He has revered Surak his whole life, the Father of them all. Yet he also feels wrong that he does not reach for Jim. That, being and acting like a true Vulcan means that he cannot comfort the one he loves in the way that is needed.  
Kirk wishes that he and Spock were alone. Spock always knew, always knows, what to do, what to say. He always manages to get Jim to do the right thing, manages to show him that there is good in what he does. He wishes he could hear those words in his deep baritone again. It seems he has a near mental break at least once every few months, and always it is Spock there for him. He feels that if he didn't have Spock there is no way in hell he'd have made it through the first year, let alone accomplished what he has accomplished. He needs that strength now, but there are more pressing matters.  
Struggling, he swallows thickly and turns to face those before him. Surak's gaze is solely focused on him, and he doesn't care about the dampness in his eyes or the way his left hand (the one with no burn) shakes violently. He wraps his fingers around the wrist of his injured hand to steady it slightly.  
He looks into Spock's eyes, and though they remain level and empty, it's almost as if he can feel his sympathy and strength seeping through him. It gives him the strength to straighten himself and face the men before him. His love is his strength, and as long as he has Spock, he can make it through anything.


End file.
